Crap design Jobs
Hello, i need very short text in German PERFECTLY with aboslute native English translated into english. I speak english myself, but not native, thatswhy i want native english speaker to translate. I dont need crap level translation !!!!! You must be very good in german and native in English. IAnd very important. I need it back within 60 minutes from award. Thank you so much. Here is the text: (114 words) ************************************************************************* Der Umgang mit Business Plänen (Bewertung, Verbesserung, Analyse) ist mein tägliches Geschäft. ich arbeite regelmäßig für ein russisch israelisches family office mit einem Milliarden Portfolio. Als Dipl.-Ing. Elektrotechnik verfüge ich &uum...
Need a data entry person to make files i can upload to XERO accounting software easily unfortunately the crap bank, Commonwealth Bank only provides XERO compatible data in CSV format fro 2 yrs I need a data entry person to convert my 4 FILES (ALREADY converted pdf to xlsx files) no w i need the 4 xlsx files into 1 clean CSV file with 4 columns only. DATE. |. AMOUNT. |. DESCRIPTION. |. BALANCE There are 2 columns in the files for AMOUNT if the cost is in the Debit column you will need to add brackets to make it a minus amount eg: $52.17 by adding ($52.17) it will show as -$52.17 both Debit & Credit columns must be combined into 1, Credits don't change but Debits need ( $ amount in brackets) to make minus amounts for the XERO software. The row that in is Debit will then...
Looking for an expert in SamCart. I got forced to upgrade and am on Scale. I set up myself a few years ago so I do understand most things, but want to redo everything and documentation is crap so just want help to do it properly. You need to know everything to do things right. How you can help depends. You can help with smart bit and teach me, or you can just get things done. I'm just listing some topics, but you should know better than me! # Pick and design new payment design and which fields # How to setup and use affiliate functionality # What the heck is customer hub and magic links # How to better structure upsells etc YOU Expert in SamCart functionality Good enough English to teach me Opinionated and will tell me best practice APPLICATION Give me one se...
...cigar tasting location inspired by rugged military backgrounds in the Navy and Army. NOTE: If you just put up some crap you took from clipart, it will immediately reject. We are also not going to do the "shotgun" approach either so if you put it up 5 or more, we will reject. We are looking for ORIGINAL art that a graphic artists, not a person sitting online could do by engaging ChatGPT. Key elements to incorporate: - Color scheme: Navy Blue, Gold, and OD Green. - Imagery: Barrels of bourbon, boxes of cigars, - Mandatory Symbols: A Barrel and a Box (If you do not have these in the art... I will reject) If you misspell our name = reject. Being proficient in graphic design and understanding of military themes is a plus for the ideal freelancer. This means all...
We have a website for client of ours whose website just dropped massively as per the attached screenshot in space of week! Due to high volume of work we need someone who can audit this website, fix the issue to st...website just dropped massively as per the attached screenshot in space of week! Due to high volume of work we need someone who can audit this website, fix the issue to stop slide. Must have access to semrush or other tools to preform the audit and come back with solution to fix it. This once of project to identify the error/fix if possible. Not ongoign work so do not ask about month seo or other crap anyone that mentions anything like that be ignored. If your work is good we may be able to give you other work for our IT company down the line but this is urgrent to ident...
...don't care if this uses WSL, Docker, Anaconda, A VM etc. I mean if you want you could dockerise it and then provide a 2 line set of instructions. I don't care as long as it works, and as long as it's using the ROCm to speed it up. The only thing I don't want to have to do is a dual boot or buy special software. If I gotta download some free software that's cool as long as it's not some malware crap. Special Note: I have spent moths trying to get this to work. I'm pretty tech savvy but I'm not a programmer, and so I realize I'm in over my head, and the worst decision I have ever made more ways than one, was buying that AMD GPU. I'm just at my wits end, I don't know if this matters all that much but below I'll list my c...
A big rivalry football game is coming up and one of the opposing teams players said some crap about my team. I'd like to make a simple design that I can have a friend print out on her cricut and apply to a sweatshirt for me to wear to the game. I can't decide between these two phrases: DEONE WHO? or THE FEELING'S MUTUAL DEONE. Can be ALL CAPS or sentence case. Not sure what will look best. Literally just those words on the front of a red sweatshirt. No specific font preference so open to any ideas although I think simple/clean will look best. Thank you in advance.
...we're still at low spends right now cus we're working on closing the leads we have. As soon as they close we re-invest almost 100% in scaling the campaign. We have a tripwire for $99 / month for review generations on their Google My Business which people seem to like, but we want to upscale that into a full blown SEO campaign in the 500- $10k+ / month range. We just get 1 of these and we scale the crap out of the FB campaign and you will get tons of calls coming. We have examples of sites we've ranked #1 organically on Google with SEO that can be used as sales material getting a lot of traffic and a video testimonial from a customers who went from $1M / year to $15m per year after we've ranked them. We might also do a cold call / cold outreach campaign as ...
Our client has a website built using a free website builder which is We need to copy this website setup including layout/pages/forum/contact setup and replicate in wordpress to look exactly same ideally (only a small website). As we need to improve SEO and the free website builder is crap for this! Please don't waste our time with 100 questions, project is simple replicate current site in worpdress, setup on the server and get it live .
Website Copywriter needed. Really, I need a Copy REwriter. To look at the crap I wrote, (500 words) and punch it up a bit, rewrite the parts that suck, tell me what needs to go, and what needs to be added. No need to understand the industry Casual tone. I'd like someone who understands the Direct Marketing / Direct Response mindset and copywriting techniques vs the huge ad agencies techniques as referenced in the below books I'm sure you've read “Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion” by Robert Cialdin "Alchemy" by Rory Sutherland Anything by Dan Kennedy
...of Freelancer :) We are looking for a nice re-design of our clinic website in nice and bright colors. Its for a website in Norway. It has to be able to be further built on in the future. Capabilities and a priority list of how to build the site. 1. Use a fast loading and most lightweight wordpress themes best one. Speed, Speed, Speed. If it's not fast, no use to re-design anything. You will have to build the site with speed in mind every step of the way, test and retest speed as you build it in a Lightweight WordPress Theme. Every image, every link, everything has to be so it does not slow down the website. Site has to deliver 100 out of 100 in score on Google page speed on mobile and desktop and on gtmetrix. 2. Re - design with a brand new logo and w...
...song belongs too. I dont know how many songs in total I am looking to do and it depends on your expertise, I say this as I am looking to do songs in all genres, from Rock, Hard Rock, Metal, Pop, Ballads, Slow songs, even classical and some other genres that i am not listing or have a weird category. I will say for sure however I Hate today popuplar music and would not do techno sound effects only crap, though the right amount used in a legitimate instrumental song can sound great. So depending on your expertise I may hire multiple freelancers for different genres depending on many factors. What I would want to receive: - A zip file containing all the necessities of the song which would include- an mp3 of the song, the project file of the song ( i am aware some ppl may use diffe...
We are serious about our project and need a team that can build and deliver. No time wasters. We are looking to build a small real estate portal with nextjs technology. Project is very small with few pages and with basic real estate functionality i.e. search, listing page, details page etc. We have paid many freelancers previously but all of them delivered us unsatisfactory and crap work. Our Conditions: - Only contact if you have previous experience in real estate portal project development. - Only contact if you can deliver high quality project. No Exception. - Only contact if you accept the payment after the full project or Half way if we are satisfied that you are capable of. We will only pay once we see your work. If you agree to this then only contact. If you're...
I'd like options for all youtube relevant sized logo graphics: Channel cover photo 2560x1440 pixels, channel profile picture 800x800 pixels, and a logo to include in uploaded videos (so like round 1920x1080pixels minimum). My channel is going to be called "Crap 4 Learn". So what I'd like is the logo and marketing material to have a similar but different version of the poop emoji, with a graduating cap. With ones holding a graduating scroll, and others without. I'd love options showing both C4L as well as Crap 4 Learn/Crap4Learn. I'd like options where the initial letters and poop image are creatively squished together into as little area as possible, as well as ones where the letters or words have more room. Also not sure if I want the emoji to h...
We are starting a new Podcast that is edgy, factual, and straight to the point. I would like something that incorporates the old mobster type and the DON. The Don was the leader of the mob. I would like a mix between the Godfather, and Sopranos, with maybe a zoot suit guy with a red tie and a hat. This podcast will be about real news, not the crap you see on msnbc, CNN, and, last but not least, Fox News.
...find several people searching for this phrase in Google. It means this topic has lots of concern to the people. We will explain about this here to address it genuinely. I have already told you that there were many fake PTC sites that fooled people many times thus people don’t believe anybody. That’s obvious also. Even now, many new sites are coming and claiming to pay $10 per click. These are all crap things and cannot be believed. So, how to find the trusted and genuine PTC sites? The only way to find it to know those sites that are paying on time, and paying for longer duration (at least for more than 2 years). But, in the beginning of this work, nobody can know about the trusted and genuine PTC sites. So, it is better to follow those who are trusted and earning wel...
...in areas south of Escondido, that’s why I used a different name. I want to know at minimum: 1) What do you think of using a different domain name outside of Escondido, since the main site has the town in the domain name? 2) What do you think of my site overall? Is it worthy of customer attention? If you watched that video, you can hear the guy sneering at it. Is it worth the sneers? Is it crap? Or could I go ahead? See I am paying him $250 per month to use his website and his call tracking, which is under his account. I would have to disconnect from his website and connect mine. From his reaction, it would be a disaster. Is that true? 3) What technical fixes need to be made on this website, other than tablet view? He has his website hard coded, by a very good co...
I'm looking for an experienced ArcGIS Pro expert to help with a project to do with data analysis. I'm providing th...expertise in GIS mapping applications and experience using ArcGIS Pro. The successful applicant must have a good understanding of data analysis, including network analysis and other specialized workflows. If you combine the necessary skills with a creative mindset and have a good eye for detail, this is the ideal job for you! Project Task: 1- Crap Classification (Like sugarcane, Harvested, Newly Plateed sugar cane, etc) how much are each. 2- Crap Health Report 3- change detection- Based on change and harvested calculation, I need to generate a change report. 4- All reporting on Dashboard(So need to build Experience Dashboard builder for report...
I'm looking for an experienced ArcGIS Pro expert to help with a project to do with data analysis. I'm providing th...expertise in GIS mapping applications and experience using ArcGIS Pro. The successful applicant must have a good understanding of data analysis, including network analysis and other specialized workflows. If you combine the necessary skills with a creative mindset and have a good eye for detail, this is the ideal job for you! Project Task: 1- Crap Classification (Like sugarcane, Harvested, Newly Plateed sugar cane, etc) how much are each. 2- Crap Health Report 3- change detection- Based on change and harvested calculation, I need to generate a change report. 4- All reporting on Dashboard(So need to build Experience Dashboard builder for report...
...timing and cost for the app. I am open to and fine with paying for a more premium package now and we can finish it later once I have more time to give more details for the app or website, etc. I would like the app to be a free download and an intro gate to my website/company and store but only if the user wants that, so there should be something funny that basically says “No I don’t want to buy your crap…” or whatever, so they can use the app without passwords or sign ons, they would only need that if they wanted to access my site, in which case it could bring them to a logon screen or check out as guest screen. I know you will need to press me to get what you need timely and I will do the best I can with my time constraints. I know if the project is d...
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I’m starting a Tree Surgery company. I’m trying to get ball rolling quickly, I’m pretty crap at using vista print ? I have some basic ideas to guide you, I just need a business card & leaflet.
Hi, I had an online store on Shopify and everything SEO related was tip-top. Approximately 1-2 years ago we moved the website to Wordpress and ever since our SEO has been crap. Sometimes the website doesn't show up on Google even if you Google the exact name, sometimes it shows up on Google but very low (other websites with f.x. less accurate product name show up above ours), I'm frequently getting emails from Google Search Console Team with some indexing issues or mobile usability issues: "Alternate page with proper canonical tag", "Blocked by ", etc. I also think the sitemap needs to be fixed? I believe things have not been set up correctly from the start so I need someone experienced to troubleshoot, figure out the problem and fix it. I believe the p...
Looking for some imagination in developing an image for 8 & 10 year old martial artists and racers/philanthropists including everyth...looking for someone that could bring my 8 & 10 year old champs into the light. They are competing in judo all around the world and preparing for go karting comp in Apr amongst other things. I would like an aggressive, yet kids friendly image for both; from social media graphics to racing gear, etc. And something that would make them stand out of all “funny cat social crap” instantly. For example, i’m trying to design their racing suits and suffering as i’ve no experience. I know what we/they want, but i can not make the software to produce it for us. Thus, it is somebody with imagination and skills in ed...
...or i will say just post it for x. you must know Ebay when you post stuff unless i say promote it then i want no charges from them except the ones with no choice, you will need to know what categories will be best for each thing my categories and sub categories suck I will pay a total of 235 dollars if when making categories and sub categories that will drive the most business that you delete the crap ones. CAN ANY ONE HELP PLEASE there needs to be categories for coins, sports cards non-sports card such as Pokémon home goods kitchen appliances yard gear for yard work garage so power too land tools e scooters bicycles skateboards kick scooters outdoor activities. ...
I am going to try to make military promotion plaques, but am new to using a Cnc. I usually do it by hand. When I attempt to use the software, it looks like crap. (My crappy version attached) What I would like to do is have the attached Indian Chief head cut out of wood. The rest I would like to have carved out. There is a set of military stripes I want to have in the middle of the headdress. I'd like to also have a rectangle box at the bottom to add the people's rank and names. I need two separate files. One with the male head and one with the female head. Thank you
Hi. I have another small project I was hoping to get help with. We changed the name of the construction company my husband and I own. I have already designed the logo but it’s non editable and just crap when I try to use it for anything. Can you copy the design into an editable image that I can use to make new merchandise for us, i.e. business cards, shirts, etc. I have attached the image that needs copied. Thank you.
What i need is on a prestashop frontpage a search bar where you can insert a browser link or ean number what opens in the same page a product page with the product price grapped from the link to add to shopping card I will explain more in video or possible in document
I mean Looking to a good explanation basically since internet Examples are crap. I need a step by step.
Ready Ludo Game Needed with Paytm Payment Gateway under Rs.10k. Higher price one don't bid. And also don't msg if you have only crap source code that is available online to buy.
we have a search bar that needs to be 440px on desktop and less on mobiles < on mobiles the search bar extends over the logo and does not work due to this you need to make sure that the search bar works on all mobile sizes the menu needs chaning CSS we want something that looks good as this one looks crap plus we want the menu to alway extend down not have another extention inside it we want some one who can make this look nice GIVE ME SOME IDEAS
I`m looking for someone that can help me edit short videos for social media, TikTok, Instagram Reels, YouTube Shorts. Twitter and Rumble. I will provide long videos, and I need someone to go trough that long video and edit the short videos, the maximum file size on this horrible crap platform is to small so I can not imbedd the video here but I have included a link to it here: I need hundreds of videos edited, but for now as this first job I need only 50 videos edited, they are very short, most of them only around 25 seconds long. If you have some experience doing this, please edit a few of them so I can see your skills
I`m looking for someone that can help me edit short videos for social media, TikTok, Instagram Reels, YouTube Shorts. Twitter and Rumble. I will provide long videos, and I need someone to go trough that long video and edit the short videos, the maximum file size on this horrible crap platform is to small so I can not imbedd the video there. I need hundreds of videos edited, but for now as this first job I need 60 videos edited, they are very short, most of them only around 25 seconds long. Please send me your price and explain me a bit about your experience maybe also sending me some links to some of your previous work
I`m looking for someone that can help me edit short videos for social media, TikTok, Instagram Reels, YouTube Shorts. Twitter and Rumble. I will provide long videos, and I need someone to go trough that long video and edit the short videos, the maximum file size on this horrible crap platform is to small so I can not imbedd the video there. I need hundreds of videos edited, but for now as this first job I need 60 videos edited, they are very short, most of them only around 25 seconds long. Please send me your price and explain me a bit about your experience maybe also sending me some links to some of your previous work
Need an expert-level Shopify developer to make a custom-made theme exactly the same as our existing site. Our existing website: It's a simple website that just needs to be imple...the product pages Example: 3. Popup window to collect Name, phone, email, and address when someone new entering into the website. Here is my Shopify site You need to start the theme development from scratch because the existing Shopify theme coding is crap. Delete/remove all themes and apps, so you can make them from scratch. Will allocate more projects if the guy is suitable and excellent in Shopify development. Thanks for your bidding !!
We are currently searching for a fresh, genuine forex trader's email, Phone list USA based of at least 50k-500k members or bigger must be single or double opt-in, not crap emails scraped using software like scrapebox, the list may be from the Forex website, from a Broker database or forum or something like that. You need to send me a list of at least 500 emails to test the quality of your list before I accept the bid.
We have a Adobe XD Design that need to convert to Wordpress with Divi Builder. 3 Subpages from the old website need to be copied to the new website. The Frontpage is started by another freelancer. If its Crap, you can start by new. Budget is fixed and start need to be by today
...the list so he does not care. I looked Carl up on and found he has 39 past and current legal matters listed dating back to 1992. I am not his first eviction. What I am upset about is his complete lack of financial responsibility and lack of respect for my personal property. I have several pictures of the 25 forty-two gallon trash bags worth of trash left for me to clean up, the cat crap and cat urine soaked items left behind and the disgusting way the bathtub was left. I have too many pictures to try and post here. I have copies of our text messages where he offers to give me some of the money he owes me after was ordered to vacate if I let him stay longer....Otherwise he was just goin to add me to bankruptcy. I told him NO. Carl works at Muller Acura of Merrillville in Indiana
Need a professional approach to my crap PowerPoint presentation.
Please help me, I have the whole concept, I need LOTS of custom code. I mean lots of custom code, no cookie cutter crap.
Serp: Singular phrase: noopept This offer is SEO SCUMERS FRIENDLY! This is a job where I pay you 0.03$ for SEO per day. If you do just nothing you will get 10.95$ after a year. Stable normal income of not doing any SEO at all. Like publishing links on not indexed domains and all other crap available here. But there is something else... An additional BONUS I will pay is your BID! If the site reaches TOP5 I am happy to pay when the site reaches TOP5! If successful there is a period of at least one month and the website survive in TOP5 then I will pay you the amount of your BID. Even if the site will rotate between positions top10 to top1. If you reach the objective you will gather stable order for this phrase and gather a bonus in the amount of your BID monthly. If you
2651 keywords and 2510 backlinks permanent high authority no toxic backlinks (no blogspot commments crap( more than 80% with anchor text
...and piece of sound design to start your movie. It's got me 100%in. Also right off the bat, the costuming is bananas and amazing. What are these suits? Complimenting a newer movie for having better visual effects isn't totally fair, but they finally nailed getting the sclera blue. Impressive. Denis and Gunn are two opposite ends of the spectrum for impactful directors in the modern age, and they both like Bautista. Probably says something. Starting this movie from the perspective of Chani is pretty inspired. Princess narration sets a different tone, and Paul isn't an underdog...yet. Beginning the story with the oppressed rather than some spoiled rich kids is a quick way to win over your audience. Man, I love that title card. The same horseshoe just rotated-Part 1? W...
Hi I have worked with the crap SEO companies in the past and lost all the faith. No doubt there will be go people who really know what they are doing and I'm searching for those. So you really need to prove yourself how you're different from rest of the crowd in order to get hired. I hope not to get burnt again. I run an ecommerce website selling CBDoil in Australia. Only one product with different strengths. Like others I want you to drive Australian Traffic to my website. Website onpage, google business page optimisation, off page backlinks for 6 months is already done. Website currently rank on page 3-4 for most of the top keywords in Google.com.au. So tell me what are you going to do next in order to get improvements and send me your best work done so far.
...the affiliate program on the Facebook platform. The goal is to actually acquire partners who will sell our products in return for a commission. We offer 30% off each paid order from the reference link. No time limits. We sell chemical reagents ... What does this mean? That it is a very profitable industry :) Withdrawal from PLN 500 to a bank account in cash. Yes in cash! No coin points or other crap that no one understands. The rules are simple, we pay in cash 30% of the value of each order to the partner's account, the payment is made after exceeding the amount of PLN 500. This affiliate program is not a sect like Avon, Oriflame or JWH and there are no fees to join. You don't have to buy our product to start selling it. There is nothing by force. There is really ni...
I need to develop an android application from scratch using Kotlin SIMPLE approach. I do not need the complex enterprise-level clean architecture crap. Google made android dev so filled with complex garbage libraries and its almost hard for newbies to catch up. I just want to get the job done in the simplest most straight forward way. I do not care about the standards. I will choose the simplest libraries, the simplest dev approach. This project is about hard-core no joke peer programming hands-on live call back to back mentorship. I'm a programmer from a different background. Mobile app dev is new to me but I'm not a beginner programmer.
I need a piece to hold a toggle switch on the side of my 5 speed gear shifter for an Exhaust Brake. I want it to look professional not lot a piece of crap. it can be a gloss matte black a be simple but looks very good.
Need to create logo and notification logo for mobile app. logo Size 2100x2100 notification 128x128 The existing logo is crap. two screenshots have ben provided how it looks in app library and where it will fit inside app.
Hello, We have a requirement on a 3D Casino Game in 3D model. It must be web based and it will be responsive in all kinds of browsers Mobile and web both. We just need Best offer for 60 seconds game play of Crap machine game Ref-video- Link - - Reference game : - Live Casino- super SIC-BO game Where, 1) 1st 30 seconds it will show screen as casino and Crap machine 3 dice, with 30 seconds of countdown 2) After this 30 second countdown end rotation of machine will start Dice movement - 15 seconds of animation 3) Dice will stopped after animation must have same result of dice as provided in API 4) After 15 seconds of Animation result will be pop up on the screen for next
...for the design.. 1. no nudity - yeah I get it's alien boobs but it's still boobs so I can't use that. Cleavage.. awesome.. nipples.. no.. Hint of booty.. sweet.... whole butt.. no... Keep it rated PG13 please. 2. We use these graphics for VINYL designs that means tons of detail is a BAD thing. keep it simple and DON'T go crazy with shading and textures. 3. 2 colors! we do designs in 2 (TWO!) colors. work in black and white and you'll be good for this. 4. It MUST.. (let me retype that) M... U....S....T... contain the number '87' somewhere in the design. put it wherever and however you want. It just has to be in there. We will never pick something you just stole off google and we've already seen what it has to of...
